Jokes by hurricanefred
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| Title | At whose expense | Keywords | Da Joke | Punch Line | Source |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Fishin' | His | Bondage | Joey comes home and finds his wife dressed up in a sexy nighty. "Tie me up" she purred, "and you can do anything you want." So he tied her up and went <punchline>. | $0.39 | Doug's Quickies |
Get the heck out! | His | Lottery, Ecstatic wife | A woman came home, screeching her car into the driveway, and hurries into the house. She slams the front door and screams "Honey, pack your bags, I've won the lottery." The husband says "Holy mackeral, what should I pack, beach stuff or mountain stuff?"... "It doesn't matter" she said, "just <punchline>" | $0.02 | Doug's quickies |
Ah hah, gotcha! | Hers | Headache | Married guy walks into the bedroom with a glass of water and an couple of extra-strength tylenol tabs. His wife asks, "what's that for?" He responds "Honey, it's for your headache" and she replies "I dont' have a headache!"... and the gleeful husband states "<punchline>" | $0.12 | adapted from jokes4all.net |
When I pull your tooth | His | Dentist, Painkiller | A man goes to an oral surgeon to have a tooth pulled. The Dentist pulls out a freezing needle to give the man a shot. "No way! No needles! I hate needles," the patient said. The Dentist starts to hook up the laughing gas and the man objects. "I can't do the gas thing. The thought of having the Gas mask on is suffocating me!" The Dentist then asks the patient if he has any objection to taking a pill. "No objection," the patient says. "I'm fine with pills." The Dentist then returns and says, "Here's a Viagra tablet." The patient says, "Wow! I didn't know Viagra worked as a pain killer!" "It doesn't," said the Dentist, "but it will give you something to hold onto <punchline>." | $1.95 | email distribution |
bottom of the 5th and the bags are loaded | Theirs | Baseball, Bourbon, Ladies | Three older ladies bring a bottle of bourbon with them to the baseball game and begin to imbibe while watching the game. After a while, they start to get worried because they're running out of bourbon but they're too tipsy to get up and buy some more. So, what can we say about how the ballgame is going? Well, we're in the <punchline>. | $0.10 | Barbie S. |
it's me! | airheads | Compact, mirror | Two ladies with light colored hair stumble across a compact lying on the ground. The first one picks up the compact and looks inside at the mirror. "My, this person looks familiar" she exclaims. The other one says "here, let me see" and then remarks, "hey you dummy, <punch line>". | $0.02 | adapted from Barbie S. |